Quick answer

If your spouse died without a will (intestate) in Connecticut, you are usually the first person entitled to make decisions about the estate and to inherit under Connecticut’s intestacy rules. The probate court controls appointment of the estate administrator, distribution of assets, and temporary allowances for the surviving spouse. Family members who try to exclude you have no automatic authority to make estate or funeral decisions unless a court has appointed them. You can ask the probate court to appoint you as administrator, to enforce your priority for burial or disposition of the body, and to protect your access to property and accounts while the estate is settled.

Detailed answer — your rights and the steps to protect them

1. Priority to make decisions about the body and funeral

Connecticut law gives the surviving spouse high priority to direct disposition of the body and funeral arrangements. If others (relatives) try to override your decision about burial or cremation, tell them you have priority as surviving spouse and, if necessary, bring the issue to the probate court or contact local law enforcement if there is an immediate disturbance. The probate court and local authorities can enforce the legal right to control disposition if needed.

2. Right to open the estate and be appointed administrator

When someone dies intestate, the estate must go through probate administration so debts can be paid and assets distributed. The probate court appoints an administrator (personal representative) for an intestate estate. As a surviving spouse you have priority to be appointed administrator or personal representative unless the court finds a reason to deny your appointment. Once you are appointed, you get the legal authority (letters of administration) banks and other institutions require to access accounts or transfer property.

3. Inheritance rights under intestacy (what you are likely to receive)

Intestacy rules decide how the deceased person’s property is divided if there is no will. In Connecticut, the surviving spouse is the primary heir under those rules. The exact share depends on whether the decedent had children and whether those children are also your children. If there are no living descendants or the only descendants are the surviving spouse’s descendants, the spouse typically receives the entire estate. If there are surviving children who are not also your children, the estate may be divided between the spouse and those children. The probate court applies Connecticut’s intestate succession rules when distributing assets.

4. Temporary financial protections for the surviving spouse

The probate process includes protections for the surviving spouse while the estate is administered. These commonly include a family allowance or support during administration and exemptions for certain personal property. The administrator can request and the court can order funds for your immediate living expenses while the estate settles.

5. Access to bank accounts, property, and personal items

Financial institutions often freeze accounts when notified of a death. To get access you will generally need either a jointly held title, a beneficiary designation, or letters of administration from the probate court. If family members are withholding personal property or keys, you can ask the probate court for an order granting you access or for appointment as administrator so you have legal authority to recover and inventory estate property.

6. What to do if family members act without legal authority

If family members are making decisions, transferring assets, or denying you access without court authorization, you have options:

• File a petition with the local Connecticut probate court asking to be appointed administrator and requesting immediate relief (temporary orders) where appropriate.
• Ask the probate court for an inventory of estate assets and for an order preventing family members from transferring or spending estate property.
• If there is immediate, unlawful interference (theft, destruction of property, physical threats), contact local law enforcement.

7. How the probate court process works in Connecticut

Start by contacting the probate court in the district where your spouse lived. You will file a petition to open an estate and apply to be appointed administrator. The court will notify interested persons and schedule a hearing if needed. Once appointed, the administrator collects assets, notifies creditors, pays valid debts, and distributes remaining property according to intestacy rules. The probate court supervises these steps and enforces its orders.

8. Timing and practical steps

Practical immediate steps to protect your rights:

1. Obtain the death certificate; request multiple certified copies.
2. Gather marriage certificate, ID, bank statements, deeds, title documents, Social Security information, and any insurance or retirement documents that name beneficiaries.
3. Contact the probate court in the town where your spouse lived and ask how to open an estate and apply for appointment as administrator.
4. If family members are acting improperly, file a petition in probate asking for appointment and for interim protections (freeze on accounts, access to property, etc.).
5. Consider consulting a Connecticut probate or estate lawyer promptly—especially if family refuses to cooperate or large assets are involved.

9. Where to read the statutes and get official information

Key probate and intestacy matters in Connecticut are handled under the Probate Court rules and Connecticut’s statutes governing probate and intestate succession. For official statutory language and probate rules, see the Connecticut General Assembly site for probate law and the Judicial Branch probate pages:

• Connecticut General Assembly — Title 45a (Probate): https://www.cga.ct.gov/current/title_45a.htm
• Connecticut Judicial Branch — Probate Court information: https://www.jud.ct.gov/probate/

Those pages will point you to the statutes and forms the probate court uses. The probate clerk can also explain local procedures and the forms to file.

10. When to get an attorney

Talk with a Connecticut probate attorney if:

• Family members are actively excluding you or transferring assets.
• There are complicated assets (business interests, closely held property, out-of-state assets).
• There are creditor claims, potential lawsuits, or disputes over heirship.

An attorney can prepare and file petitions, present your case to the probate judge, and seek injunctive relief if necessary.

Helpful Hints — practical checklist for surviving spouses in Connecticut

• Get several certified death certificates right away; banks and government agencies usually require originals.
• Bring your marriage certificate and photo ID when you go to probate court.
• Contact the probate court in the town where your spouse lived; ask for the form to open an intestate estate and to apply to be administrator.
• If family members refuse to return keys or personal items, ask the court for an order granting you access pending appointment.
• Keep a written log of interactions with the deceased’s relatives (who said what and when) and preserve texts or emails that show interference.
• Do not sign away rights under pressure. If asked to sign documents, get a copy and, if unsure, ask the probate clerk or an attorney before signing.
• If you need fast action to prevent asset dissipation, ask the probate court for emergency temporary orders; an attorney can help frame such a request quickly.
• Look for jointly titled property and beneficiary designations (life insurance, retirement accounts). Those often pass outside probate to the named beneficiary.
• Use the probate court’s self-help resources and forms early; many courts provide step-by-step guidance for intestate estates and appointment petitions.

Final note and disclaimer

This article explains general Connecticut probate and intestacy principles and common steps surviving spouses can take when a spouse dies without a will and family members try to exclude them. This is educational information only and not legal advice. Laws and court procedures change, and every case has unique facts. For advice tailored to your situation, contact a Connecticut probate attorney or the local probate court.